I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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