You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
