I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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