mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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