Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Randomize
