Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
