Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
