hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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