our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
