im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize