HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We need to get me chipped asap
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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