you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Randomize