Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
His hands were made for my vagina.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize