so explain again why im purple
no
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
