I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
