do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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