No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
