have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
