i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
