I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize