he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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