So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
