Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
