We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm getting married
To pizza
Help me help you realize you are a moron
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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