awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
