I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
