Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize