There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
