i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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