Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
