Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize