Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
