just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just had sex on a roof
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
