My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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