so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
