Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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