I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
