Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
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