i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
