Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
