I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
