Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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