I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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