So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
