i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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