I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
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