Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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