I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
