Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
