I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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