Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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