Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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